The Official Articles of Play

For The Links at Dad’s Hollow

Magnolia Spring Farm

Preamble

Be it known that upon the grounds of Magnolia Spring Farm, near the quiet waters of Dad’s Hollow, a noble contest of skill, restraint, and occasional fortune shall be conducted under the following Articles of Play.

All who take club in hand agree to abide therein in good spirit and good company.

I. Of the Course

The course known as The Links at Dad’s Hollow shall consist of several Par-Three holes, set across field and fair grass according to the natural lay of the land and the modest ambitions of its designers.

Natural contours, shifting breezes, and the proximity of Dad’s Hollow shall be considered part of the challenge and not grounds for complaint.

II. Of the Objective

The object of play is to advance the ball from the appointed teeing ground toward the bucket in the fewest strokes possible.

The bucket stands as both destination and final authority.

Should the ball strike the bucket, the hole shall be considered completed.

Should the ball enter the bucket, the player shall subtract one stroke from the total taken upon that hole — a feat worthy of admiration and occasional boasting.

III. Of the Implements

Competitors may employ:

A traditional lofted golf club
An oversized-headed club of generous persuasion
Any implement judged reasonable and not dangerous to nearby participants

All swings shall be made in a manner befitting civilized company and reasonable safety.

Wild flailing, though occasionally effective, is discouraged.

IV. Of Scoring

The player’s score shall equal the number of strokes taken to strike the bucket.

If the ball enters the bucket, one stroke shall be deducted.

Examples for clarity:

A hole-in-one which lands within the bucket shall score –1
A ball entering the bucket on the fourth stroke shall score 3
A ball striking the bucket on the fourth stroke shall score 4

Let the player judge carefully which outcome he prefers.

V. Of Hazards

The waters known as Dad’s Hollow stand as a natural hazard.

Should a ball enter these waters, the player shall assess one penalty stroke and continue play from a reasonable position nearby.

Excessive attempts to retrieve said ball from the depths may be met with laughter from fellow competitors.

VI. Of Conduct

Competitors are expected to conduct themselves with:

Good humor
Honest scoring
Proper encouragement of fellow players

Excessive bragging shall be tolerated only when fully deserved.

Complaints about wind, grass height, bucket placement, or alleged injustices of fate shall be received politely and ignored entirely.

VII. Of Victory

The player completing the course with the lowest score shall be declared the victor of the round and may enjoy the admiration of all present.

Such victory, however, shall not excuse the champion from helping gather balls or reset buckets afterward.

Closing Declaration

Thus are established the Articles of Play for The Links at Dad’s Hollow, that all who visit Magnolia Spring Farm may enjoy sport, fellowship, and the occasional improbable shot.

Play well.
Laugh often.
And mind the water.